Friday, July 24, 2009

More helpful hints on how to deal with Swine Flu

Anthimos, originally uploaded by Teacher Dude's BBQ.

Like many of you, I am worried about the Swine Flu pandemic that is raging across the globe and so I, too am looking for ways in which to keep myself and loved ones safe should the worst happen.

So I would like to share some words of advice given by Bishop Anthimos, one of the Greek Orthodox church's most senior figures when asked about whether the church would change Holy Communion procedures given the flu epidemic. According to the bishop there is no need to worry as the Communion serving spoons are made of silver which kills microbes.

"Σύγχυση πάντως επικρατεί και ως προς τη θεϊκή προστασία. Ερωτηθέντες αν ο ιός μεταδίδεται διά της θείας κοινωνίας, ο μεν αρχιεπίσκοπος Ιερώνυμος είπε ότι «αυτά είναι θέματα ιερά και θεολογικά και δεν συζητούνται», ο δε μητροπολίτης Ανθιμος ότι τα κοχλιάρια είναι από ασήμι, το οποίο σκοτώνει τα μικρόβια. Και οι δύσπιστοι δεν πίστεψαν."

Then again, this is from the same man of god who said that all sex outside marriage is a form of prostitution and that same sex relations are an abomination. Ahhh, give me some more of that old time religion.

Keep safe and hang onto the family silver. You never know when you might need it next.


oriste said...

Whouhaaa! The typical church reaction would be so hilarious if it wasn't so sad. Well written post with just the right undertone of sarcasm. Carry on, soldier! ;-)

Theodosios said...

Well there is only one way to prove Anthimos theory and put the mind of people at rest. Put a titrate of live virus particles on a silver spoon, dip it in the communion and let him have a sip. Wait for 48-72 hours and observe.
To make the test statistically significant repeat at least three times.

If this works I will have to inform my coleauges and change our working practices!!!!