More helpful hints on how to deal with Swine Flu

Anthimos, originally uploaded by Teacher Dude's BBQ.

Like many of you, I am worried about the Swine Flu pandemic that is raging across the globe and so I, too am looking for ways in which to keep myself and loved ones safe should the worst happen.

So I would like to share some words of advice given by Bishop Anthimos, one of the Greek Orthodox church's most senior figures when asked about whether the church would change Holy Communion procedures given the flu epidemic. According to the bishop there is no need to worry as the Communion serving spoons are made of silver which kills microbes.

"Σύγχυση πάντως επικρατεί και ως προς τη θεϊκή προστασία. Ερωτηθέντες αν ο ιός μεταδίδεται διά της θείας κοινωνίας, ο μεν αρχιεπίσκοπος Ιερώνυμος είπε ότι «αυτά είναι θέματα ιερά και θεολογικά και δεν συζητούνται», ο δε μητροπολίτης Ανθιμος ότι τα κοχλιάρια είναι από ασήμι, το οποίο σκοτώνει τα μικρόβια. Και οι δύσπιστοι δεν πίστεψαν."

Kathimerini.gr

Then again, this is from the same man of god who said that all sex outside marriage is a form of prostitution and that same sex relations are an abomination. Ahhh, give me some more of that old time religion.

Keep safe and hang onto the family silver. You never know when you might need it next.

Swine flu: London confirms troop deployment

Swine flu: London confirms deployment, originally uploaded by Teacher Dude's BBQ.

Swine flu: London confirms deployment

Speaking at a press conference earlier this morning, Minister Banns announced the government's decision to reinforce the suverveillance zones that had been set up by the Territorial Militias in Tower Hamlets, Toxteth, Guildford, Highbury, the Wirral and Brighton and St Pauls, Bristol.

"The measures have been taken in order to preserve public order and to guarantee the health and welfare of England." said Kenneth Phillips, the head of the Office for Political Orthodoxy .

Units from the Second Infantry Division and elements of the Army Air Corp would be taking part in the operation which is expected to see the deployment of 4,300 troops across the country.

As a result of the new security measures announced today a curfew has been announced for all affected areas that will come into force from 7pm tonight. Anyone found breaking the curfew is subject to military justice and may be detained for a period of no less than 60 days.

While denying that the army had been issued shot to kill orders minister Banns reiterated that the army and militias were permitted the use of lethal force in order to ensure public safety. He added that while he hoped that no such action would be necessary the government had made it clear that no one would be allowed to threaten the integrity of the English nation.

As a result of the new security measures announced today a curfew has been announced for all affected areas that will come into force from 7pm tonight. Anyone found breaking the curfew is subject to military justice and may be detained for a period of no less than 60 days.

High chancellor Adam Sutler said that he had the highest confidence in the ability of the English people to deal with this latest crisis in a calm and reasonable manner.

"Throughout the history of this country we have been tried and not found wanting. I expect the people of this great nation once again to raise to the challenge that fate has thrown into out midst and show the world that we are not for turning." He added in his address to the nation this evening.

news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/londonconfirmsdeployment.stm

THIS IS A SATIRICAL ARTICLE AIMED AT RAISING AWARENESS OF THE ISSUES INVOLVED WITH MASS SURVEILLANCE AND SHOULD NOT BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY. NONE OF THE INCIDENTS MENTIONED ARE REAL.

Swine flu: If you suspect it, report it.

Swine flu: If you suspect it, report it., originally uploaded by Teacher Dude's BBQ.

Family infected with Swine flu

A England-wide ban on movement of all non - essential personnel is in place after a family of four in Surrey were found to be infected, possibly with the virulent Guildford strain of Swine - flu

Some 60 neighbours on the estate close to the village of Wanborough near Guildford have tested positive for the disease which wreaked havoc in 2001.

A 3km protection zone has been put in place around the premises.

High Chancellor, Adam Sutler cancelled his holiday in Dorset and took part in a meeting of government's Cobra emergency committee.

In accordance with legislation, all infected cases in the Surrey area will be resettled, Norsefire Chief Medical Officer Desmond Rennolds said.

The estate has been under restrictions since late on Thursday when symptoms were reported.

Mr Rennolds confirmed the outbreak after samples were taken from the home.

She said: "We are trying to form a picture of where the infection may have come from but at the moment it's very early stages.

"It is the absolute priority at the moment to prevent further spread, and piece together information about how it might have got there in the first place."

Scientific analysis of the virus could be available late on Saturday, but it may take longer depending on the exact strain of the disease involved.

“ Even the words 'Swine flu' will send a chill through the spine of every household in the country ” Tom Vonner, Moral Alliance said.

The Cobra committee was reconvened and met for 50 minutes on Saturday to review the latest developments.

Mr Rennolds has advised people across the country to examine their neighbours carefully and immediately report anything suspicious.

As well as the 3km protection zone, there is also a 10km surveillance zone where nearby all suspected cases are monitored.

BBC News

THIS IS A SATIRICAL ARTICLE AIMED AT RAISING AWARENESS OF THE ISSUES INVOLVED WITH MASS SURVEILLANCE AND SHOULD NOT BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY. NONE OF THE INCIDENTS MENTIONED ARE REAL.